Manchester, England - August 6

In this episode of Ruth and Steve's excellent adventure we delve into the story of how we got into trouble with the police.

And how exactly would that be?


Read on and find out....


Thursday August 6

Today started with an early start. We were up to get the 8am train to Stoke-on-Trent where we were meeting Steve’s Cousin David and his wife Beccy (the ones who’s wedding we’d attended in June). We were heading to a theme park for the day – Alston Towers. They picked us up a little after 10 but it was after lunch by the time we got in as it was a bit of a drive and the ques were bad. We went on 4 rides for the day – there was an average wait of an hour for each which was a bit shite, but they were worth it in the end.

We went on Nemisis first, which was similar to a roller coster but you were hanging down from the bar above. It came so close to the ground and other obstructions that it felt like it was going to take off your feet at the ankle, so I spent the ride trying to tuck me feet up (even through they were strapped in). Beccy screamed the whole way... It was funny seeing the picture at the end – they take pictures and try and sell them to you just like most theme parks these days - Alton Towers is most like Dreamworld back home. It’s all a big black hole for your wallet here. I’m surprised the don’t charge for the toilet, since they charge for just about everything else.

After that we headed to Air, which was a bit slower than Nemesis but strapped you horizontally so that you were parallel with the ground. The ride is supposed to make you feel like you are flying. It also got pretty close to the ground and trees and stuff but this time felt like it would take off your arms as they were hanging down and your ankles were strapped.

Next up was Oblivion. Oblivion was my favourite, by far. It was the only one that actually took my breath away. It was the shortest ride, most were around 2 minutes, but this I think would have been over in less than 1. You are strapped in 2 rows of 8 people and you are strapped upright it chairs that are attached to the ride at your feet. You start by going up a steep incline at low speed. There’s a flat part at the top and it takes you to the edge of a 90 degree drop. It tilts you over the edge and stops, so you are suspended at the top looking down over the drop. You can’t see the bottom as it disappears underground and reappears about 20 metres away. But to go from the top to the bottom you are perpendicular to the ground. The ride drops you suddenly and you plunge at high speed into the black hole at the bottom. It’s an instantaneous rush, it’s over in a few seconds but it takes your breath away. You reappear vertically again a few seconds later on the other side and after a brief steep up slope the ride is over. I wanted to go on it again straight away.

We wanted to go on Rita, which does 0-100 in 2.5 seconds and I think is one of the fastest rides in the world, but it was closed. Bummer...

So we went to the ‘log ride’. I can’t remember what it’s called but it’s the same as the log ride at Dreamworld, a slow moving water ride but instead of floating in a log you are in a bath tub. I took my jumper off and put it in a plastic bag as I knew I’d get soaked and get cold. Despite the ‘warm’ start to the day it turned cloudy and cold by the afternoon. We decided to all pull faces for the camera this time, and it turned out so funny that Dave and Beccy bought the picture. I have my tongue poking out, Steve’s eye balls are half rolled and he has 2 thumbs up, and Beccy and Dave look like they are screaming. We all got soaked... They actually have drying booths for all the water rides, but it will cost you 2 pounds ($4Au) for the privilege. No thanks, that’s a pint darlin’

We lined up for one final ride for the day but Air had closed by then, as had Rita so the line was nearly an hour and a half, so after about 50 minutes and only getting half way we bailed and went home. Beccy and Dave were staying in Manchester for the night so after a feed we met up again at a bar called Yates across from their hotel and drank with them for a few hours. We got to know them a lot better over the course of the day and that evening, which is really cool cos they are both awesome people. They also told us not to go home, if we had to sleep on their floor until we got jobs then we should. Always nice to have an emergency plan...

After we left the pub we headed to the bus stop to wait for the night bus. There was a chick there who instantly started talking to us at a million miles an hour telling us how jaded she was and how she’s old and doesn’t party like she used to did I know what she meant I mean it’s like she can’t stay out all night like she used to blah blah repeat same story blah blah repeat... and I think to myself it’s funny that you’re at the bus stop waiting for the night bus and you’re clearly off your face? Partyting perhaps? She told me how she was so old cos she’s 29 and I laughed. I try to tell her I’m that old too but she’s talking so fast I can’t get a word in. To be fair (and yes I picked this up from Dave over the course of the night), she might just have had one of those personalities, maybe she really was just in her own little world and liked to relate it to other people at the speed of light repeatedly but it seemed that she was everything she talked about being over. Complete with “can I get your number and we should stay in touch seriously? and like hang out?” Like seriously! She didn't know anything about us...

It was then that we met Max and Rhianna. They were waiting for the bus too. After a brief discussion, we all agreed to share a cab since there were 5 of us waiting for the same bus. As it turned out, Max lived about a 2 minute walk from our place and the girl who talked really fast live about half an hour walk away but since she didn't have more than a bus fare in money we got her as far as Max's place. She stayed for a beer before leaving.

Max had lived in Australia for 2 years and lived with a police woman in Melbourne (in Fitzroy I think). One night they had a party and got drunk and him and his mate ended up wearing her work shirts. And so it came to be that after disappearing into his room for 10 minutes to find it, Max reappeared wearing a genuine Victorian police shirt. The chick still owed him money so he had kept the shirt, and though he was miffed that the shirt had effectively cost $350, I assured him it was great entertainment value for us... And so we got into plenty of trouble with the Victorian police, we stayed and partied with Max and Rhianna until well after dawn. We listened to proper old blues music because Rhianna was into that kind of stuff and some weird abstract dance music that Max was into. It was so funny getting trashed with him in his house while he had a cop shirt on, we laughed about it for ages. I asked him if he knew what rank she was, and we looked up on Wikipedia what the bits on the shoulders said her rank was: Senior Constable. We stumbled home about 8am and crashed for the morning.